As the year is coming to a close I’ve been able to reflect on how gracious God has been to our family from a large move from Bellingham, WA to the Chicagoland area to His provision and comfort as our youngest son Lucas had a complex febrile seizure. I look at my family and I am so thankful for the blessing of being a husband and father. However, there are some of you that read that last line and felt a knot in your stomach. As the year comes to the close you are staring at another year wondering if there will be a significant other, a family, or children in your future. I remember thinking the same thing. As I reflect on my years as a single adult I came to the realization that there was much joy to be found but was never experienced. This was a combination of my own selfishness, a lack of gospel perspective, and looking at a perceived future and not living my immediate present. So, if you’re single, or you have friends or family that are single and are worried about it; here are five reasons to take joy in singleness.
5 Reasons To Take Joy In Singleness
Your Singleness Is An Opportunity
Possibly, one of my biggest issues many people have is that they view their singleness as an obstacle. However, your singleness is really an opportunity not an obstacle. Singleness provides you the freedom and flexibility that you can’t find when you have the responsibility of marriage and family. I believe this is also why Paul comments on the benefits of being single. The opportunity to travel, to jump into a long term missions project, to change the direction of your career path and pursue what your passionate about are all opportunities. Viewing your singleness as an opportunity allows you to maximize your time and efforts. Don’t waste your opportunities in front of you because you are dreaming about what could be.
It Allows You To Form A Solid Foundation
What an incredible opportunity to develop yourself! One of the biggest myths about marriage is that it will fix you. The reality is that marriage is a process of sanctification. Taking two screwed up people and bringing them together to become one. In essence, you have double the challenge because instead of competing for your own ambitions you know have another person in the mix! Singleness however, provides a platform to identify your weaknesses. To begin to focus on them and develop them as you prepare yourself for the future that God has for you. Being intentional about this will not just benefit you, but if and when God calls you to marriage, it will be a blessing to your spouse. Forming this solid foundation will pay off big time in any serious relationship in the future.
It Allows You To Be Devoted To God In A Special Way
The Apostle Paul in 1 Co 7:32-35 unpacks the special ability the single individual has to be devoted to God. This is a special time where your devotion and utmost priority can be to pursue ministry in a manner that can only be achieved when you are free from the responsibility of marriage and family. For some, this may be a lifelong calling, but for many there is a short window to execute and pursue this devotion. Don’t miss the opportunity!
It Allows You To Serve People
You can find great joy out of simply serving people. Rather looking to your own needs, or what you can get out of serving, serve because it’s what Jesus modeled. In fact, an incredible practical way for you to exercise this is to find a couple that has kids in your church that you are friends with and ask them if you can babysit for them so they can go on a date night. As a married man, one of the things my wife and I are always talking about is a babysitter for our date nights. You will be amazed at the joy you will get from seeing your married friends enjoy a night out and simultaneously how great it feels to hang with some kids for an afternoon. You can also serve your community or neighborhood.
It Allows You Find Your Satisfaction In The Person Of Christ
One of the greatest lies that the single person may face is that when they get married or find that significant person that their problem of loneliness will be solved. First, this type of thinking places an enormous burden on the significant other, and it is something that they can never fully solve. In fact, there is not a better time, than in your singleness to both believe and experience the satisfaction of Christ.
The scriptures are saturated with this reality. What an incredible truth that we can experience and believe, that Christ is our ultimate satisfaction in life. He truly is better.